Being demisexual means I don't purse sex the way I'm "supposed" to, but sometimes desire it when I'm not "supposed" to. For a long time, I was ashamed of both of these things.
It’s not that I think dichotomies like “asexual”/“allosexual” and “voluntary celibate”/“involuntary celibate” are meaningless. But I find them, at best, an awkward fit for my own experience.
This is my first ever submission to Carnival of Aces, the current theme of which is “Many Ways to be Ace”.