Manchester by the Sea (2016) – Ace Long Review

Manchester by the Sea
Starring: Casey Affleck, Lucas Hedges
Written & Directed by: Kenneth Lonergan
U.S.A., 2016

In “Toward an Asexual Narrative Structure” (an essay in Asexualities: Feminist and Queer Perspectives (2014)), Elizabeth Hanna Hanson writes that an asexual narrative would be “more or less a story in which nothing happens”.  Manchester by the Sea is not a story in which nothing happens, but it could be seen as a story about nothing happening.

The film moves slowly, consisting mostly of quiet scenes that are beautifully filmed and scored with stately Baroque music.  Lee is a janitor in Boston who seems to drift through life without taking any joy in it.  His low-profile existence is disrupted when his brother Joe dies, making him the guardian of his sixteen-year-old nephew Patrick.  Joe’s dying wish was for Lee to move back to his hometown and raise Patrick in Joe’s house.

There’s no explicit asexuality in this movie.  Patrick is two-timing two girlfriends, both of whom he is sexually active with.  Lee seems a bit shocked by this, but he’s not really in an emotional place to be giving lectures about consent.  For his part, Lee was once married, and the flashbacks we see of his relationship with his wife and children do not give us a reason to view him as anything other than straight.  However, they also tell us about the tragedy that changed Lee’s life and turned him into a very different person.

Outside of the flashbacks, Lee is completely celibate.  That’s not for lack of opportunity.  One of the tenants he services has a crush on him, and the single mother of one of Patrick’s girlfriends keeps trying to draw him out.  But he avoids all romantic or sexual entanglements.

In practice, this gives him a very ace vibe.  The impression we get is not that he’s denying himself sex or romance, but that he’s simply uninterested in them.  Of course, Lee’s “asexuality” (if you want to call it that) is clearly the result of his traumatic experience rather than an inherent quality he was born with.  But many aces attribute their lack of sexual interest to trauma.  While it may not be the most common narrative for how people come to a sexual identity, it’s still a valid one.  And so it may be valid to see Lee as ace – or at least as representing one kind of ace experience.

But, for me, what really makes this film interesting is the ending.  In many movies, new responsibilities become a hero’s ticket out of trauma, prompting them to move past their grief and overcome their limitations.  And yet this film ends with Lee returning to Boston and passing the care of Patrick off on a family friend.  Instead of being about Lee’s rehabilitation, the movie ends up being about his failure.

I have mixed feelings about this ending.  In all honesty, Lee is clearly in need of therapy, and getting some might well make him better equipped to take on a parenting role.  And of course I would like to think that Lee could eventually overcome his pain and find happiness again.  But if we accept that those just aren’t options, then his ultimate decision can actually be seen as courageous and even empowering.  Too many stories celebrate heroes taking on challenges that seem beyond them; too few acknowledge that sometimes the challenge really is beyond them.  While persevering at a difficult task can be a mark of courage, it can also be a mark of egotism.  And, when it is, the truly courageous thing may be to acknowledge one’s own failure and let someone more capable take over.

It’s this “failure” that resonates with me as an ace person.  As I said in my review of It’s a Wonderful Life, asexuality can be seen as a kind of “failure”, as “failing” at normative heterosexuality.  Narratives about perseverance might suggest that we should keep trying until we succeed.  A narrative like this one is a reminder that sometimes more effort won’t lead to more success, and we’re better off focusing our energy elsewhere.

Abdicating parenting duties does not mean that Lee gives up his role in Patrick’s life.  At the end of the movie, he is making plans for Patrick to come visit him in Boston.  Though he cannot be Patrick’s father, he can still be his uncle, continuing the relationship they have had since Patrick’s childhood and maintaining their family bond.  This validation of an avuncular relationship is another thing that makes the movie unusual.  Lee is not forced into an either-or choice between raising Patrick and having no role in his life whatsoever.  He is allowed to offer him the limited relationship that seems to be all he is capable of.

Many stories are about characters growing and changing.  Manchester by the Sea is about a character not growing and not changing.  That is the “nothing” I referred to at the beginning of this review.  This lack of change isn’t necessarily portrayed as good – any more than many of the film’s tragedies are portrayed as good – but it is portrayed as a real and valid part of human experience.  Ultimately, if Lee does achieve something at the end of this movie, it’s an acceptance of his own stasis.  And that feels kind of ace to me.

3.5 Stars; 4 Aces